It really is astonishing how much more fun and interesting this book is when we're focused on the actual heroes as opposed to that stupid fucking shard. And in this chapter, we continue the fun, as Drizzt and Wulfgar prepare their assault on Biggrin's lair.



So we join Drizzt and Wulfgar as they find the back entrance to the verbeeg lair. The verbeeg don't seem very subtle: the lair is strewn with piles of garbage and bones, and there's a strong smell of roasting mutton.

Drizzt makes a wisecrack and Wulfgar laughs at the dark elf's "uncanny composure". Honestly, I think Mr. Salvatore is at least a little in love with Drizzt. The wisecrack was amusing, but not THAT funny.

One fat verbeeg (weren't they all described as tall and thin earlier) who is probably the cook shuffles out of the cave, and Drizzt claims him. He asks Wulfgar to provide a distraction and showing a shocking amount of growth, Wulfgar says Guenhwyvar would do, though he isn't keen on being alone with her.

Drizzt actually encounters some difficulty for once: the rocky slope is a rougher climb than expected, which slows him down. He almost gets caught. Finally, he gets in place above the entrance and with Guen's help, he cuts "an ear-to-ear smile into the giant's throat". Oh and "Without uttering a cry the verbeeg tumbled down the rocks to settle in with the rest of the garbage"

Dude, harsh!

So anyway, he, Guen and Wulfgar go inside, through the kitchen (which seems surprisingly well stocked given the characterization of the giants), and then further inside. They discover six giants immediately nearby, and Drizzt gives the battle plan. Wulfgar wonders why he doesn't give instructions to Guen, but then understands: "[e]ven the skeptical barbarian was confident that Guenhwyvar would figure out where it best fit in."

You know, I don't think Wulfgar gets enough credit for how adaptable he is. Remember how he was freaking out last chapter? Here, he's fine with it. Skeptical, but fine.

Anyway, fight scenes are fun to read but boring to recap, suffice it to say, this is a fun fight scene, with hammers, flour being used to blind an adversary, big cats, a throwing hammer (that at one point just misses Drizzt, we're told that had Drizzt realized, he "might have had choice words for his friend" Hey dude, it's your battle plan), and the phrase "a mesmerizing dance of death".

Toward the end, the last giant rushes a now unarmed Wulfgar (I guess Aegis-Fang is taking longer than usual to come back) and lifts him in the air, trying to squeeze the life out of him. This is similar to the attempt at death by bear hug last chapter too. Wulfgar must be very huggable.

Oh, by the way, at least according to the Forgotten Realms wikipedia, Wulfgar was born in 1339 DR and the Crystal Shard started in 1351 DR. Which means that Wulfgar the standard bearer was fucking TWELVE. He's SEVENTEEN now.

You know, honestly, I think the kid is doing pretty fucking well for seventeen. I'm just saying. (Also, Bruenor, What The Fuck?)

So anyway, the hammer returns to his hand and he's able to smash the shit out of the giant. They hear more giants coming, Wulfgar shouts to go back outside, but Drizzt wants to fight a bit more. We're told that "Wulfgar knew they were pushing their luck, but once again he found himself listening to the elf. And once again the barbarian was smiling."

Meanwhile, Drizzt stabs a piece of meat with a dagger and starts eating it. Which is pretty awesome. I'll be honest with you, I do NOT remember Drizzt being this awesome. I remember him being mopey and pontificating. I'll be happy to be wrong!

So more fighting. It's pretty great. Drizzt has many knives and is good at killing from behind. Things get a little hairy though when a verbeeg throws a rock at Drizzt's head. He ducks, but it still gets him in the shoulder and sends him flying to the floor.

Wait. How does he DUCK out of the way but it still gets him in the shoulder?

Anyway, Guen to the rescue. Drizzt does thank her. That's important. For his part, Wulfgar does pretty well. At one point he gets a club to the ribs, but he's a sturdy sort, so it barely bothers him. He does spend a moment to appreciate the endless hours toiling for Bruenor in the mines, and the miles and miles of running Drizzt had led him through during their sessions.

You know, starting when he was TWELVE.

By the end, there are thirteen dead verbeeg, and Drizzt has a slightly wounded left arm. Drizzt asks Wulfgar about something he shouted when was charged by giants, and Wulfgar laughs and explains it's an old Elk Tribe battle cry. Which, oddly, causes Drizzt to eye him suspiciously and wonder just how deep ran Wulfgar's ability to fabricate a lie on demand

Wait. What?

Look, Drizzt is clearly Salvatore's pet character. So he's probably going to end up being right about this. But what? Why? At no point so far has Wulfgar been anything other than straightforward and honest. He's clearly stated his intention to go back to his people. He refused to take an oath not to harm the folks of Ten Towns because he didn't know if he could keep it. He's open about his reactions, positive or negative.

Why would Wulfgar lie about this? What could he have actually said? I am bewildered.

Back to the action, there's one injured verbeeg left who seems weirdly calm. He says that Biggrin will play with them before killing them. He explains that Biggrin is his leader, then he creepily says that he serves "the master" (sadly not the Doctor Who version) and that "Glory is to die for Akar Kessell"

This understandably makes Drizzt and Wulfgar uneasy, since they'd never seen or heard of this kind of thing from a verbeeg. To be fair, Wulfgar spent five years in a cave, smithing shit. But Drizzt is pretty worldly. When he learns that Biggrin also follows this master, Drizzt is uneasy. As is Wulfgar, since a verbeeg chieftain giving up power to another without a fight is unheard of.

They determine that they'll have to take out ANYONE in the cave who might get back to warn Akar Kessell. Fortunately, our heroes are spared the moral quandary of killing a helpless prisoner: the verbeeg attacks them and all three take him down quickly. He dies with a smile.

Wulfgar and Drizzt continue through the caves, which are swanky. Drizzt thinks Akar Kessell planned to use it as a home base. Wulfgar is less sanguine, as he doesn't have Drizzt's dark vision, and his torch is burning low. There's an amusing interlude where they crawl through chimneys to spy on Biggrin (they see him behead an underling), then hunt for Biggrin.

Sadly, Biggrin is not as stupid as his underlings, he sends his last soldier out a secret door to get a message to Akar Kessell, while Biggrin himself intends to take on Wulfgar and Drizzt in hopes that their heads will appease his angry boss.

As Wulfgar and Drizzt find the Biggrin's lavish chamber, Wulfgar stops and motions for Drizzt to be quiet. We're told that Wulfgar has "[t]he intangible quality of a true warrior, the sixth sense that allows him to sense unseen danger". Apparently Forgotten Realms Warriors have spider-sense. Still it works, he smashes the door and knocks Biggrin to the ground.

Drizzt, meanwhile, notices the open side door and sends Guen to chase the verbeeg.

Biggrin is made from sturdier stuff and he shakes off the hammer to the skull, and the fight begins. It's a rough one. Wulfgar is battle-weary, and he ends up getting smashed into the wall and knocked out. Drizzt still has a wounded arm and can't parry any blows. He manages to flee out of the cave, getting Biggrin to follow him. Thanks to a well placed tree, he gets to ambush his enemy. Even so, the giant ends up grabbing Drizzt and throwing him onto his injured shoulder. But happily, Wulfgar's back in the fray.

During his ambush, Drizzt had managed to shove a couple of knives into Biggrin's chest. They're not doing much good, but Wulfgar manages a nice blow with Aegis-Fang that pushes one of the knives farther in, through the lining of his heart. It takes a bit for anyone to realize what happened, until Biggrin collapses dead, mid charge.

When they get back to the secret door, Wulfgar decides to wait for Guenhwyvar (growth!) while Drizzt goes in to get some more food. I really am amused by this Drizzt's ability to think with his stomach. Though actually, he's got another goal. From the earlier verbeeg's evasiveness about the one tunnel they hadn't gone down, Drizzt suspects treasure!

Really dude? Why keep that from Wulfgar?

We then switch scenes to Guen and her chase of the last verbeeg. She ends up steering him toward a big mountain pool with a surprise giant snake inside. Squeeze!

Good kitty.