I Read What?!

Chapter Thirteen | Table of Contents | Chapter Fourteen (Part II)

Corneille Noire: Welcome back to Eragon, everyone! Last time, Eragon found out that Garrow had died. This time, the adventure will start!

Before we begin, I would like to note that I have decided to change Use ‘Em As You Will to Improve Your Environmental Subplot (IYES), as coined by the NRSG on BattleAxe.

I have also decided to change Hell-Bound Partners to Best Partners Ever.

For the reader post, Chessy notes on chapter 4 that Saphira’s hatching is quite off: given how large she is, she ought to have broken off the entire top part of the egg, not just a tiny little piece. She also notes that Saphira ought to be much more exhausted after getting out of the egg, and that her rocking her egg makes no sense.

So, for all that:

This Cannot Be: 29

I also cannot help but wonder how the young dragons manage to hatch if their eggs are harder than diamond. They do not seem to have any kind of egg-tooth, or similar structure, so my best guess is magic? That could have been established better.

Missing Puzzle Pieces: 199

Finally, “The Doom of Innocence” takes place on the 19^th of December, as Fumurti neglected to mention that.

Now over to Kerlois!

Kerlois: Well, it is good to be back, and to be tackling a chapter in which there is some actual plot. Let us begin, then.

Chapter Fourteen / Fifteen: A Rider’s Blade

Hmm, this chapter title does not fit very well. Yes, we will see a Rider’s sword in this chapter, but that is hardly the only thing that happens in here. I would think that a reference to Eragon going on an adventure would be appropriate, too.

Well, whatever my thoughts on that, we open on Eragon awaking, for the fourth chapter in a row. It is now the 22^nd of December. “Anguish envelope[s]” him.

Paoclichés: 21 (you truly should have that looked at, Eragon)

He keeps his eyes closed, but that does not prevent him from crying. He “searche[s] for some idea or hope to help him keep his sanity”. So it seems we are coming down on the side of “overwrought grief”. How… lovely. He cries (or “moan[s]”, in the Knopf edition) that he cannot live with this. And then we get a conversation, and I would like to go through this bit-by-bit.

Then don’t. Saphira’s words reverberated in his head.

Ummm…

1) Where did Saphira come from? There is no indication, in either edition, that she was in contact in him before she speaks. I assume that she was awake before Eragon and waited to contact him as soon as he woke up, then? This is confusing.

PPP: 472

2) I note that she does not bother to give him condolences for Garrow’s death, or just ask him how he is feeling. Nor will she do so later in this chapter. How very caring.

Best Partners Ever: 175

3) Her actual advice is not very helpful, either. Yes, he should not live with it, but what should he do then, Saphira?

4) Finally, why is her voice “reverberating” in his head?

~~~

S: How? Garrow is gone, forever! And in time, I must meet the same fate.

K: How? Garrow is gone forever! And in time, I must meet the same fate.

(The difference in the editions here is an extra comma in the self-published one.)

Well, I think this shows well how useless Saphira’s advice was. The only way I can think of for him not to “live with it” is for him to kill himself, and I do not think Saphira meant that. And here, Eragon rightly points out that he cannot apply that to himself, either. Yes, he will not die of his own accord, but in the end, he will eventually die of something.

Love, family, accomplishments—they are all torn away, leaving nothing.

Ah, good to see that Eragon is talking very stiltedly, too.

Forgot the Narrator Speaker: 25

Aside from that, good to see the beginning of Paolini’s somewhat over-enthusiastic use of “accomplishment”. Also, while I can see why Eragon lists “family” here, I have my doubts about “love” and “accomplishments”; I do not see how those can be torn away as easily.

What is the worth of anything we do?

Well, I would say that the worth is in the impact it has on the world around you. No matter how small it might be, it is still worth it, and it can even last beyond your own life.

~~~

The worth is in the act.

Well, this is a somewhat… different philosophy. Saphira think, as far as I can tell, that doing things is worthy in and of itself, regardless of what those things are. Then again, it might just be that she is trying to get Eragon to feel better. It would still help if she told him how to act, though.

S: To die is to lose the vitality of movement.

Which means…? And what relationship does this have to what she just said? What is she even trying to say here? Okay, I do vaguely understand what she means, but this was rightly cut.

S: Your worth will halt if you surrender the will to change and to experience life.

K: Your worth halts when you surrender the will to change and experience life.

Well, first for the changes here. The Knopf edition is better here, especially without the repetition of “to change and to experience”.

Now for the content. I note that “surrendering the will to change and experience life” seems like a symptom of depression to me. So here we have Saphira saying that “your worth halts when you are depressed”, or, what I get from it, “depressed people have less moral worth”. I do not think that is what Paolini intended, but it is what he got, and it is a very unfortunate look.

Bullyay: 32

It is also a very effective way to get me to despise Saphira, by the way. Is it so hard to hold a philosophy like “no matter what acts anyone may do, they still have moral worth because they are alive”? Then again, considering some of the places this series goes to later, holding such a philosophy might genuinely be beyond its scope.

On the level of this conversation, this is quite awful, too. Like, it is not a good idea for him to “surrender the will to change and experience life”, sure, but then you should prevent him from getting to that point, Saphira! With the way she frames it here, it sounds like she would blame him for that if it got to that point, as if it is a bad thing he does, instead of something that can happen to anyone at all, that is not the person’s fault, and that should get compassion, not blame!

Best Partners Ever: 180 (+5)

Bullyay: 33

Also, there are other options for him than “deciding to give up on life” and “blindly acting”. I feel like she equates “grieving with Garrow” with the former, especially since it does not count as “acting”, and that she is thus telling him not to grieve for Garrow.

Now for that:

1) Saphira, you do not have any right to dictate whether or not Eragon grieves for Garrow. It is exactly as simple as that. You may not like it, sure, but that does not mean that you may forbid him to do so.

2) You do recognise that grieving is a very natural process, and that it would be best for him to let it run its course, do you not? And also that telling him that it is wrong is a very bad thing to say to him? No, of course not.

Best Partners Ever: 185 (+5)

The emphasis on “acting” is not too good, either. After all, he ought to at least have a plan about how he is going to act, not just go off doing things randomly. Care to help him out with that, Saphira?

S: Options are before you. Choose one and dedicate yourself to it.

K: But options are before you; choose one and dedicate yourself to it.

Ah yes, I should also give a point for how stiltedly Saphira talks.

Forgot the Narrator Speaker: 26

This underscores what I was just talking about; she acts as if it is his responsibility to pick an “option” and do something with it. And there is noticeably no mention of Eragon actually taking the time to grieve. No, he must act so he can keep his moral worth.

The deeds will give you new hope and purpose.

So Saphira does seem to be trying to help… but she is going about it horribly. Not that Eragon will be allowed to complain about this, ever.

Look Away: 352

Sparkly Damsel: 16

~~~

But what can I do?

Good question, Eragon! Saphira has indeed not given him any answer as of yet.

~~~

The only true guide is your heart. Nothing less than its supreme desire can help you.

Well, at least she encourages him to follow his own desires… Still, it could be quite dangerous for him to do so, and I see no qualification at all in here, so would she just let him kill himself if he chose a dangerous path?

Best Partners Ever: 186

I have to say that I have little idea why she is actually doing this. She might be actually trying to help, though she expresses it terribly. Or maybe, given what she will say later, she just wants to go adventuring? That seems most likely to me.

Manual Patch Job: 60

The self-published edition has more things here:

S: Many do not experience pure emotions,

And you get this from where? From your interaction with Eragon, and the things he told you about others? From your ancestral memories? That is barely a basis for making such a sweeping assertion. Also, how do you define “pure emotions”? This is ridiculous.

S: but you must be driven by that fire—or crushed by those with power.

1) And what if he is not “driven by that fire”, Saphira? What will you do, then? Try to make him feel pure emotions?

2) “Those with power”. Why be so vague, when you clearly mean Galbatorix and the various lords and ladies of the Empire?

3) I see you have already decided you will be adventuring, Saphira. You truly should discuss that with Eragon first.

S: Do you think great things are accomplished by stale people?

1) Get your worldviews far away from me, Saphira. “Stale people”? Truly now?

2) Well, Saphira, I do not think “great things” in general are accomplished by individuals. “Great things” are simply too complex for that. Good to see the beginning of the strange focus on individualism this series has.

S: Destiny decreed that you would become a Rider. It is your responsibility to the future.

1) So Umaroth is now “destiny”, it seems. Yes, I know it is unintentional, but with hindsight, it comes off as quite unsettling.

2) What is Eragon’s “responsibility to the future”? Being a Rider, experiencing “pure emotions”, or doing great things? I think the last one.

3) Why does he have “a responsibility to the future”, instead of a responsibility to the present, and the people of Alagaësia? What Saphira gives is not as motivating, I would think.

4) Also, I do not think “doing great deeds”, without any further qualification, is inherently responsible. After all, Galbatorix and the Forsworn also were also Riders, and bringing down the Riders was certainly a “great deed”. And yet, no one seems to think that that was “responsible”.

Well, back to both editions, now.

~~~

She left him to ponder her statements.

Half abuse, and half meaningless nonsense.

Eragon examined his emotions. It surprised him that, more than grief, he found a searing anger. What do you want me to do… pursue the strangers?

Nothing much to say here, though I am surprised that he apparently did not notice his anger before now. As for Eragon’s question, well, at least he has reasoned what she wants of him.

~~~

Yes.

Well, one word, and I will unleash some analysis on it.

First off, let me say that I can see why Paolini had Saphira say all this: so Eragon will be motivated to go on adventure, so we finally can get on with the plot. And I certainly feel along with that need (else I would not have been constantly complaining earlier), but there was a much easier way to go about this.

That would be to let Eragon stay for some time after Garrow’s death in Carvahall, and then have Brom be the one to lead Eragon on adventure, both with the promise of revenge and the prospect of keeping others safe from the Ra’zac. But nooooo, we had to go with this.

Well, now it is time for me to gripe about all the ways in which this fails.

So, Saphira, you want Eragon to pursue the Ra’zac. There are only the following issues with that:

1) Eragon is still quite weak from his injuries, and he needs more time to recover. You should give him that.

2) How will you secure provisions for Eragon? Is Eragon supposed to hunt and gather his food on the way?

3) How will you overtake the Ra’zac? They have left on the 19^th of December, and it is now the 22^nd of December, so they have a lead of three days. The best way would be to fly, except that we already saw what that does to Eragon’s legs. Is he supposed to bleed to near-death again?

4) If you meet the Ra’zac, how will you fight them? They can control Eragon’s mind, after all, so he would be useless, and they could hold him hostage against Saphira, too.

5) And, in the case you would kill them, what would you do after that? Go back to Carvahall, or do Rider things because you are ~supposed to~?

And Saphira wants Eragon to do this, despite the above points.

Best Partners Ever: 196 (+10) (2 points per bullet seems like a fair exchange to me)

Ill Logic: 177 (+10)

~~~

Her frank answer confused him. He took a deep, trembling breath. Why?

I do like how he notes that she has not been giving direct answers before now.

~~~

Now we will get a paragraph that is entirely different between editions. I will do the self-published edition first.

S: Because I am a dragon. Understand what that means. We are the stuff of legends, more the dreams of the world than of reality.

Yes, we have noticed that just so much with you. And when we will see more dragons later on, they feel quite grounded in reality. Also, “more the dreams than of reality” is very clunky. I would suggest “more of the dreams than of reality”.

S: But we aren’t remembered for hiding in forests.

Why would they be hiding in forests, anyway? I get the impression that they are partial to deserts and mountains, too, and those would make for good hiding places, too.

S: A dragon has a duty to the future of this land.

Again this stuff about having a duty to the future, I see. Also, why do dragons specifically have a duty to Alagaësia? As I have already demonstrated, there ought to be dragons in Alalëa, too. Do they have a duty to Alagaësia over Alalëa, then?

Come to think of it, this attitude truly should have a count… Let me chuck out Shine Bright Like A Diamond, as it not exactly necessary, and introduce Alagaësia Is Not the World. No points yet, as this is the self-published edition, but it will eventually fill in.

S: There are mighty deeds to be done in this age, and I won’t let you live complacently while they pass away.

What “mighty deeds”, exactly? And good to see that her motivation here is apparently indeed “adventuring”. Note that she does not say it is an imperative that he participates in these events or the like; she only says that she will make him participate in those events. And yes, there is the “duty to the land” part, but she ought to be emphasizing that.

S: Your life is no longer your own. It belongs to the opportunities that await us.

Way to be authoritarian, Saphira. Also, I think that Eragon’s life is still his own, in that he can make the choice which opportunity to pick.

S: To be a Rider is to accept impossible tasks, to do what no one else will attempt. That is why we will be remembered.

Really? Is that what a Rider is supposed to do? That might apply as well to deposing Galbatorix, as to trying to break Alagaësia in two. Both are things that “no one else will attempt”, at least in part because they seem impossible, but the former is overall necessary and might be a good thing, while the latter is an absolute disaster, and should never be done. And well, you will “be remembered” for both.

And that is also a problem I have with this speech: Saphira implies that doing great things in and of itself is a good thing, but it very much depends on what the specific thing is.

On to the Knopf edition, then.

K: Remember what you said in the Spine?

Oh no. Did we truly need to have this?

K: How you reminded me of my duty as dragon, and I returned with you despite the urging of my instinct?

Well, Fumurti was absolutely justified in giving this This Is Fine points, it seems. Because here, Eragon verbally abusing her is “reminding her of her duty as dragon”. Eragon called her a coward for being afraid of the Ra’zac, who could easily have defeated them. That is what happened, not whatever nonsense Paolini is trying to feed us.

In fact, let me rename Write It, and Keep It to History-Rewriting Narrator, and let me reduce the multiple points to single ones…

History-Rewriting Narrator: 53

This Is Fine: 80

There we go. And I gave it this because Saphira should know this! She was angry at Eragon for it, but now she is perfectly fine with how he treated her! So also this:

Sparkly Damsel: 17

K: So, too, must you control yourself.

…So you know exactly how awful it was to experience this from Eragon, and yet, you think it fit to do the same to him. (And no, I do not care if she would be doing this as some kind of “revenge”. If it is wrong for Eragon, than it is wrong for Saphira.)

And what do you want him to do then, Saphira? Do you want him to stop grieving for Garrow, because that stands in the way of being a Rider or something? Because it certainly looks like it. I have already explained why that is completely wrong, so I will simply note that there is no reason that he has to “control himself” right now; it does not mean at all that he cannot be a proper Rider, so this is just Saphira being awful.

Best Partners Ever: 187

Sparkly Damsel: 18

This Is Fine: 81

K: I thought long and deep the past few days, and I realized what it means to be dragon and Rider: It is our destiny to attempt the impossible, to accomplish great deeds regardless of fear.

Ah, so here we have a remix of the arguments from the self-published edition. It is clear here that she just thought up all this herself, though, which makes it a little less impressive.

I also note that here Riders are supposed to do great deeds “regardless of fear”. That only underscores the point I just made about this, as many things they could be feeling fear about doing are things that should not be done. With my examples, they would probably be afraid of deposing Galbatorix and of tearing apart Alagaësia, and in the latter case, it is completely justified. And yet, Saphira treats the two as if they are in the same category.

It is our responsibility to the future.

Well, at least now she acknowledges that she has a responsibility herself…

Ill Logic: 178 (for responsibility to the future)

~~~

I don’t care what you say; those aren’t reasons to leave! cried Eragon.

Good to see that Eragon has entirely ignored what she just said, in both editions! And he is very right in saying that these are not reasons to leave.

~~~

Then here are others. My tracks have been seen, and people are alert to my presence. Eventually I will be exposed.

Good to see we are now in arguments that are actually likely to sway Eragon, and that actually make more sense. I do have two things to say, though:

1) Why is Saphira telling Eragon this as if it is new information? He told her yesterday.

2) I would not say that people are “alert to your presence” specifically. They are aware of the presence of a being that should not be there, but they do not know that it is you, specifically, or even that it is a dragon.

Unless that is what you want, we should depart.

Entirely true, and a good argument. Why could we not have led with this? Why did we need all of the previous stuff, in fact?

Get to the Point Already: 18

S: And eventually the strangers are going to return—do you think they’ll be satisfied until they find us?

Another solid argument, and it truly should not have been cut. It does make me wonder… Saphira says here that the Ra’zac will return “eventually”, but why would they? Why not stay in Palancar Valley and attack them as soon as possible? They are supposed to be very dangerous and evil, after all. Not that their actual showing supports that…

Let me introduce Why Are They So Evil?, then, for all the times (unfortunately many) that the villains fail to live up to the hype. What do we have so far… Durza failing to catch Arya because he sent his Urgals to do the job, the Ra’zac not catching Eragon when they easily could, letting Garrow tear off a piece of clothing, and accidentally setting the house on fire.

Why Are They So Evil?: 4

Come to think of it, them sticking around in Carvahall for less than two days also gets a point for this. In Eldest, they are perfectly content to wait around Carvahall, but here they leave within two days, even though the mission is more important? I get the impression that they truly cannot be bothered to spend more than a token amount of energy on this (and good on them, I say).

Why Are They So Evil?: 5

And the lack of showing us any oppression from the Empire so far gets us another point.

Why Are They So Evil?: 6

Back to the story at hand, then.

Besides, there is nothing here for you. No farm, no family, and—

And we are right back into manipulation. I think it might by Eragon’s choice, not yours, if there is anything of value for him there. And he does not need a farm or a family for there to be something for him; he has Carvahall and its inhabitants, after all.

Best Partners Ever: 188

Also, what are you talking about with “no family”? Roran may not be in Carvahall at the moment, but he still is alive, as far as we know.

~~~

Roran’s not dead! he said vehemently.

Exactly, Eragon!

~~~

But if you stay, you’ll have to explain what really happened. He has a right to know how and why his father died. What might he do once he knows of me?

1) Well, what could he do? You are well aware of any possible risk; if he tried to harm you or got others to try, you could simply grab Eragon and fly away. This might have made sense back when Eragon first found her; it does not do so now.

2) Yes, Roran indeed has a right to know that. Good to see that her reasoning is “telling him might put us in danger, so we will not tell him”. Like, as I just pointed out, the danger is quite minimal, and also, could Eragon not try to tell someone, and have them promise to tell Roran while they are gone hunting the strangers? (Maybe Calitha? I would like to see one of the background villagers get something to do for once, especially a woman.)

3) Seriously, though, they will never try to explain what happened until Eragon meets Roran again, approximately a year and a half further on. And Saphira justifies it here by saying that he might harm her, which is very unlikely.

This Is Fine: 82

4) Also, does Saphira really mean that Eragon will not have to explain if he does leave? That makes it even worse!

5) Why would Roran need to be told about Saphira in order to know “how and why his father died”, per se? If Eragon did not want to reveal Saphira, he could just repeat the cover story he gave to Horst and the others, and that might suffice in the meantime.

Well, let me go back to summarising now.

The self-published edition notes that Eragon “[does] not know” what Roran might do. Not much, I would say. In both editions, Saphira’s “arguments whirl[] around in his head”. He does not want to leave Palancar Valley, as it is his home (and nearly everyone he knows lives there, so it will not be easy). Still, “the though of enacting vengeance on the strangers” is “fiercely comforting” to him. Hmmm, I can see why he wants to do this, but it is still not a very good course of action… Saphira should tell him to take it a bit more calm.

He asks her if he is strong enough, and she says that he has her. Not that that counts for much. “Doubt besiege[s] him”, as he thinks it is “a wild, desperate thing to do.”

Paoclichés: 22 (doubt besieged him?)

He gets contemptuous about his indecision, and “a harsh smile dance[s] on his lips.” And, well, just see the rest for yourself.

Saphira was right. Nothing mattered anymore except the act itself. The doing is the thing. And what would give him more satisfaction than hunting down the strangers? A terrible energy and strength began to grow in him. It grabbed his emotions and forged them into a solid bar of anger with one word stamped on it: revenge. His head pounded as he said with conviction, I will do it.

My first reaction to this is: “calm down, edgelord”. This is so overblown that I find it very hard to take seriously. Especially the bit about Eragon’s emotions being forged into a “bar of anger”… I am feeling so silly now that I made a picture of it:

Yes, this is what Eragon’s emotions look like now… And he will certainly kill the Ra’zac, people. He will just break through their mind-control by the sheer strength of his will! Oh, if I could, I would be laughing now.

More seriously, should Saphira not be intervening now? Also, what is Paolini aiming for with this? I genuinely have no idea.

Well, Eragon “sever[s] the contact with Saphira” and gets out of bed, “his body tensed like a coiled spring.” Um, why does he break contact? Would it not be better to be able to contact her whenever he needs it?

Ill Logic: 179

Also, why does Saphira not try to re-establish contact? It would be better if she kept a tight watch on Eragon, in case things went wrong, which is quite likely, given the state he is in. What if he would fall down the stairs, for example? How would she know about it, then?

Best Partners Ever: 187

Ill Logic: 180

It is still “early morning”, and we are told that he has “only slept a few hours”. That would be a few hours since he last fell asleep, not a few hours in total, as he also slept before he found out that Garrow was dead.

PPP: 473

Eragon then thinks this: Nothing is more dangerous than an enemy with nothing to lose. Which is what I have become.

Truly now? You just said to Saphira that you have plenty to lose, and now you say this?

Forgot Your Own Canon Again?: 87

Also, way not to care about Roran and Saphira. Are they “nothing”, then?

Best Partners Ever: 188

He tells us that yesterday, he had trouble walking, but now “he moved confidently, held in place by his iron will.” He feels energy coursing through his veins, “making him feel stronger than ever before.” “The pain his body sent him was defied and ignored.”

Ah, good to see more edgelord stuff. I do not think this will bring him very far, though. Yes, he may have no trouble standing up now, and he may ignore the pain, but his body is simply still quite weak. At some point, he will simply find that he cannot go on, no matter how much he may want to. This does seem like good way to get hurt to me, though.

Well, he creeps out of the house (and presumably descend the staircase), and then he hears “two people talking”. He is curious and stops to listen. Elain speaks first, saying something about having “place to stay”, and that they have enough room. Horst says something that Eragon does not hear, and Elain says “the poor boy”.

Horst then speaks up again, this time audibly. He says he has been thinking about Eragon’s story, and he does not think Eragon told the entire truth. (Good to see him notice this!) Elain gets concerned and asks what Horst means.

Horst explains, saying this: “When we started for their farm, the road was scraped smooth by the board he dragged Garrow on.” Ummm… This seems off to me… I think it is that Horst does not mention Brom at all, and to me, that seems to imply that he thinks Eragon dragged Garrow all the way to Carvahall by himself. Combined with how no one has mentioned Brom for the past chapters, and I get the distinct impression that Brom put Eragon on the board once he passed out, dragged Eragon and Garrow to the edge of Carvahall, made it seem as if Eragon had passed out there, and then went away as fast as he could.

I do wonder what his motive for that might be… Given that he has not shown himself in the past few days, it might be that he wants to avoid being involved with the villagers in any way. And the reason for that might be… that he wants to go adventuring with Eragon, and having to answer questions from the villagers would get in the way of that. Also, later this chapter, he says that he wants to see wants to see where Eragon’s story goes, so that supports this, too.

And I recognise that it may seem far-fetched, but it does fit what we see, and as we will see later on, Brom has not been above doing similar things in the past. So let me see… this seems like a good place to introduce With Leaders Like These… which will go for all the times that the leaders of the “heroic” faction undermine their own efforts. 1 point for Brom not acting when he saw Eragon’s palm, and 1 point for this.

With Leaders Like These…: 2

Let me get rid of Just Gonna Stand There while I am at it, too.

For the rest… Well, it was nice of him to get Eragon and Garrow all the way to Carvahall, but how hard could it be to give at least some explanation of what happened? He can read and write, after all, so he could leave a message with Gertrude (who is the only other literate person in the village at this point), without having to speak with anyone in person. It is not a problem yet, but I am quite annoyed at him.

Back to the conversation. Horst says they kept going, until they reached a place “where the snow was all trampled and churned up.” And there Eragon’s footprints and “signs of the board” stopped…. (Yes, the self-published edition does have a dramatic ellipse here.) They also saw the “giant tracks” from the farm.

The Knopf edition merges these two sentences, and says that the footprints stopped there, but they also saw the giant tracks. Um, how do these two things contradict each other? Yes, I can see why Horst would say something like this, but I think “though” would flow better here.

PPP: 474

Horst then brings up Eragon’s legs, and says that he does not believe “[Eragon] didn’t notice losing that much skin.” Well, Horst, believe it or not, that is nonetheless what happened. Also, Paolini, do we truly need this lampshade? You know what, I will give it this:

Read the Discussion Boards: 9

It may not be a direct reaction to criticism, but I think it may double fine for lampshades.

Well, Horst says that he did not want to push Eragon for answers earlier, but now he will. Elain suggests that Eragon might be so scared by what he saw that he does not want to talk about it. Horst says that “still doesn’t explain” how Eragon got Garrow most of the way to Carvahall “without leaving any tracks.”

Eragon thinks that Saphira was right: it is “time to leave”. There are “too many questions from too many people”, and soon or late, they will find the answers. So why was this necessary? Eragon has already decided that he wants to leave, and because of that, the distrust of the villagers does not matter. This would be nice to include if he wanted to stay in Carvahall for a little longer, but here it is useless, and it stands in the way of going on with the plot.

Get to the Point Already: 19

Eragon then creeps out of the house, tensing “whenever the floor creak[s]”. Outside, the streets are clear, as it is still early. He stops for a while, and the self-published edition notes that he “consider[s] what to do.” He says he struggles to think clearly, and he simply wants to “curl up in a corner and be alone”. Yes, he should absolutely be left unsupervised. But “he force[s] himself to concentrate, Kill the strangers, and the grief fade[s] slightly.” That is quite clunklily written. He tells himself to concentrate.

In the Knopf edition, he simply stops and goes right to the thinking. In both editions, he says that he does not need a horse, as “Saphira will be [his] steed” (as she will be unfortunately often later on), but she does need a saddle. He thinks Saphira can hunt for the both of them, so he “[doesn’t] have to worry about food”, though he should “get some anyway.” But Eragon, you cannot survive solely on animals that Saphira hunts, or you will get scurvy. (No that this series ever shows scurvy being a problem…) Why was not re-establishing the connection a good idea, again? He says that he can find everything else he needs buried in his house.

Then we get this:

S: He went to the tanning vats on the outskirts of Carvahall.

K: He went to Gedric’s tanning vats on the outskirts of Carvahall.

Hmmm… I think these sentences would have been better off switched. In the self-published edition, it feels a little strange for me to see no mention of Gedric when we know they are his. And in the Knopf edition, we suddenly get a reference to Gedric, who has never been named before. Also, in both editions, this does not fit entirely well with the previous paragraph.

PPP: 475

Well, the “vile smell [makes] him cringe” (I just included this because I thought it sounded nice), but he goes for “a shack set into the side of a hill” where Gedric keeps the hides. The self-published edition notes that it is unlocked, so he goes inside. In both editions, he cuts down “three large ox hides” from the skins that hang from the ceiling. “The thievery made him feel guilty, but he reasoned, It’s not really stealing. I’ll pay Gedric back someday, along with Horst.”

1) Well, it is stealing. Gedric has not given you permission to take these hides, after all, and you do not know whether you will ever have the chance to pay him back.

2) I guess he cuts it down with his hunting knife, but that has not been mentioned in quite some time… Could have been integrated better.

3) Yes, he may be stealing, but I find it hard to find much fault with him, because he only takes a small portion of Gedric’s hides, and because he does it to stop the Ra’zac, which means they cannot hurt more people.

Well, he rolls up the hides and takes them to “a stand of trees away from the village”. There he puts them between the branches of one, and goes back to Carvahall. He decides to go for food. He first heads for the Seven Sheaves, but then “smile[s] tightly and reverse[s] direction.” “If he was going to steal, it might as well be from Sloan.”

1) Well, I do hate this. This is “I hate Sloan because he refused to give me meat (because he is probably traumatised by his wife dying there) and because he told my name to the Ra’zac (which they could have got out of him regardless), and so I will steal from him specifically.”

Petty Ain’t the Word For You: 61

2) And pettiness is all it is, as this is a very poor choice to make. For one, meat is the one thing he will not be missing; he needs food with vitamin C in it to not get scurvy. And also, it will be rotting quite fast, and he does not have a good means to keep it from going bad.

3) So, in conclusion, he is undercutting his mission just to spite Sloan. I frankly do not know what to say to that.

Ill Logic: 180

Petty Ain’t the Word For You: 62

He “cautiously sneak[s] up” to Sloan’s house. He says that the front door is barred when Sloan is not there (but Sloan’s reaction earlier is absolutely not indicative of deeper-seated issues!), but the “side door [is] secured with only a thin chain”, and he breaks that easily. Good going, Eragon!

Look Away: 353

Inside, the rooms are dark. He fumbles around until he finds “hard piles of meat wrapped in cloth.” Um, where is Sloan getting all this from? How many animals have been killed recently, then? And what kind of way of preserving meat is this? There is no way the villagers could eat all this in time! Also, this seems quite inconvenient to me. It is just… what.

Ill Logic: 185 (+5)

Why Are We Doing This?: 65 (if I am wrong, do correct me about this)

As it is, it just seems like a convenient way of letting Eragon get meat without him having to find something to gather it in.

But Thou Must: 80

Come to think of it, it is also quite convenient that none of the villagers go looking after Brom…

But Thou Must: 81

Well, he stuffs as many meat as he can under his shirt, then hurries out and closes the door.

Look Away: 354

It seems Eragon’s escape has been noticed, as a woman “shout[s] his name nearby.” He “clasp[s] the bottom of his shirt” to keep the meat from falling, and ducks around a corner. Horst walks by, “not ten feet away”, but does not see him.

As soon as Horst is gone, Eragon runs out of the village, legs burning. He turns to look if he is being pursued, but he is not. The self-published edition has some more things here: Eragon lets out his breath and “sway[s] as dizziness over[comes] him.” It soon recedes, but then he feels very nauseous and almost throws up. The Knopf edition deletes all of this, because who cares about Eragon having a halfway realistic reaction to exerting himself so much while being wounded?

Well, he reaches for the leather, but it is gone. The self-published edition notes that he looks at the ground, “thinking that it might have fallen.” Just then, someone asks “Going somewhere?” Oh my!

Eragon whirls around and sees:

“Brom scowled angrily at him, an ugly wound on the side of his head. A short sword hung at his belt in a brown sheath. The hides were in his hands.”

Dun dun dun! And that is where I will leave it at for now. See you next time!